Family Loss......

I know that the loss of a family member is something everyone fears and is never fully prepared for. Even if that person has suffered for a long time with health issues, you're never really able to wrap your head around the fact that they may not always be with you.

Maybe it's the fact that for as long as you remember anything, that family member has been in your life. They've always been there, being a part of holiday celebrations, weddings, birthday celebrations and even the funerals of others. They are often a major constant in your life, even if you don't have daily contact with them....you just always feel they'll be there.

My Uncle was that person in my life. He was married to my Mom's older sister, the father to several cousins and someone that, while he didn't say a lot, you always knew he was in your corner. I always knew that if I really needed help, I could go to him and my Aunt and they would help me in any way possible. He wasn't a big old teddy bear that smiled a lot, laughed a lot or hugged you, but I always felt safe with him, when I was a child and loved by him, all through my life. I'm going to miss him and the sad thing is, my loss is nothing compared to what my Aunt and cousins must be feeling.

One memory that will stick with me always, involving my Uncle Dave took place, years ago. I was probably 6-8 years old and it was Summer and I'd probably been staying with the family for a week or more. Uncle Dave came home and piled us all into the Scout they used to have. At the time, there was five kids in their family and I think he and Aunt Boob used to take us out for a ride to cool us down and calm us down. We got back to their house and Aunt Boob began dinner and took a break to go lay in the bedroom with Uncle Dave. I was and still am terrified of thunder/lightning storms and one popped up. I was out in the kitchen with my cousins and didn't want to let on what was bothering me, so I started sobbing that I wanted to go home. Betsy or Pami probably went in and told them I was upset and crying to go home. Uncle Dave called me in and pulled me onto the bed between him and Aunt Boob. He asked what was wrong and I said I just wanted to go home....he looked at me and said, 'But, Kimi, if you go home, who's going to make our Kool-Aid?'. That was one of my jobs in helping prepare the meal. In that moment, he made me feel very needed and thought I couldn't possibly leave the family without a Kool-Aid maker, so in that moment, my fear was forgotten and I was thrilled to think I was, 'needed'. I'll always remember that and the love and acceptance that I feel with Uncle Dave and Aunt Boob. Thanks for that, to you both!

How can you ever find words to comfort people when they lose someone that was as special as he was. My Uncle was that kind of man.....never brought attention to anything he did, he just went about doing what was right in his own way. He was there for his family and those of us that were part of his extended family. I feel a sense of sadness, because he wasn't the type of man that you said mushy things to, but I hope that somehow, he knew how much I loved him and how important he was in my life. You can never replace a presence like that and I feel very fortunate to have had him in my life, as long as I did. I love you, Uncle Dave, I miss you and wish you were still with us, for my own selfish reasons, but you battled with all you had and for so long, I wish you peace and we will miss you!